It's All Relative

By Gini Graham Scott

Blood Is Thicker at the Water Cooler

Coming from a dysfunctional family can be normal. But working in a dysfunctional family company can be trouble.

Statistics show more small privately held U.S. businesses are family-owned and family-run. In big companies, the influence of clan members is usually diluted by a large management team and even larger workforce. Plus, corporations are pressured by shareholders, together with public record and reporting requirements, to ensure that most of those family members put on the payroll are both qualified and competent.

But in diminutive operations, run by mom and pop, or father and son, or any other combination of family, the smaller the company, the more power these relatives have over the non-family front-line or lower-level employees. Yes, when it comes to nepotism versus merit, blood is thicker than water--especially at the water coolor.

Sure, there are lots of instances when Sis or Sonny Boy are really terrific at their jobs. But one reader -- let's call him Paul -- finds himself working for Dumb and Dumber: specifically, two brothers who manage a small family-run collection agency.

The pair inherited their supervisory positions when their father retired a year ago. Paul's immediate boss is David, the smarter and more qualified sibling who graduated from college with a business major. But the firm's head of operations is David's brother John, who sounds like a major screw-up.

John's job is to make sure the collection agency's computer software, payroll system, and everyday administrative procedures run smoothly. Sounds simple enough. Instead, this brother makes mistake after mistake, then creates still more problems when he tries to fix those errors. When that happens, David comes to John's aid. Which wouldn't matter if the two siblings worked alone. But Paul and the other agents complain to one another about the quality, or lack of it, of John's work.

They're all afraid to speak up to David because of his close relationship with John as well as others in the family. They fear David might fire them, or punish them by giving them harder leads for collection cases, which would have the effect of reducing their earnings since they work on a commission arrangement.

Paul thinks the whole thing stinks. And he's right. Usually, that unqualified clan member will just bumble along, protected by one or more other family members who cover for him or clean up after him. They do so out of obligation, like helping a troubled or disabled family member. So, as a non-family employee, Paul may simply have to realize that black sheep brother just comes with the territory.

There is always the possibility that the ne'er-do-well family member will mess up so badly and so obviously that the whole situation becomes too embarrassing to the family and too much of a liability to the company. In such cases, the rest of the clan is likely to move the screw-up to a less vital position within the company, or even out of it altogether.

Barring such a clear-cut disaster, if this unqualified family member is indeed hampering operations and upsetting people, Paul could still take action. Paul might make his supervisor David more aware of the extent of the problem and accompanying high degree of dissatisfaction among other employees. One way to do this is for Paul to seek strength and safety in numbers.

Specifically, Paul and his co-workers could start making a timeline that keeps track of when John does something wrong that results in loss or inefficiency to the company. Then, with the problem documented, Paul is in a better position to discuss the problem with David as part of a group of colleagues similarly upset by John's behavior. Once David sees how seriously John's actions have been undermining company operations and employee morale, he will start to take them more seriously

Still, it's always possible that David's commitment to the company and his staff won't out-trump his commitment to his clan. So Paul also has the option of doing an end-run around David altogether and convincing the group to go to David's boss (whether family member or not) and present a united front.

Individually, Paul also might consider just helping John do a better job. Maybe Paul could give John feedback on some of the weaknesses of the systems which John set up and offer advice on how to solve them. Providing such assistance might help to ingratiate Paul not just with John but also with others in the family. If you can help a family member in trouble, maybe the family will help you, too. After all, when it comes to a family-run company, don't fight it--join it.

Gini Graham Scott, Ph.D., J.D., is an author and specialist in organizational behavior, conflict resolution, and creativity. To discuss a work-related relationship problem, send a brief description of the dilemma with an e-mail address and a phone number to GiniS@aol.com.

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