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This is a sample column I wrote several years ago as a commentary on current events. I could write a similar column on events today. Feel free to down load for review. If you're interested in syndicating such a column on current topics, let me know. It's just like in nature -- the time to be especially wary of being attacked by sharks -- like con artists, unscrupulous people, and criminals -- is when you're vulnerable. Some people are altruistic, humanitarian, and truly want to help. But some people see vulnerability as a chance to take advantage of you. So that's when the vultures swoop down, predators pounce, and sharks swim in -- in everyday life like in nature. At such times, be especially alert. Is someone trying to help you -- or is it a circling shark? By paying attention, you may be able to avoid such an attack. I learned this lesson at first hand when I flew to San Diego to settle my mother's estate. I planned to drive her old 87 Toyota Camry back to my house in Oakland, stopping to see some friends and relatives along the way, then sell the car after I got home. But during the estate sale, which I advertised with signs around the neighborhood, a woman who lived nearby -- let's call her Irma -- asked to buy the car. She talked about how perfect this car would be for her daughter, starting school in a few weeks. She seemingly agreed to the price I planned to charge, around $5400; and talked convincingly about the advantages of selling now -- a sure buyer and a quick flight back to Oakland. She even offered to help me pack and ship some large paintings I couldn't take with me on the plane. I decided her offer sounded like the perfect arrangement. But over the next couple of days, as I finished settling the estate, she found reasons to repeatedly push down the price. First, though I had been driving the car without any problems for several days, Irma complained of a slight drag on the gas flow that would require some tune up and engine work to fix. I dropped the price $700 to cover these costs. The next day, Irma said she wanted to have a mechanic test the car to be really sure it was okay, and she brought over a Spanish speaking mechanic. He discovered some more damage, including a leaking radiator and oil leak requiring even more engine work. The problem, he claimed, is the car hadn't been properly maintained and serviced. In fact, with Irma translating, he warned that the car might not be safe to drive. Though my mother had always been a careful driver, I didn't know about the car myself; so believing the mechanic, I felt very relieved that someone was taking the car and I wouldn't have to drive it home 500 miles. And quite naturally, I agreed to drop still more off the price -- down to $4400 now. That evening, after I bought an extra large suitcase to pack for my flight, and Irma sat nearby helping me pack, she began worrying that the car might not only need a new engine, but it could have still other problems. These might turn up, she explained, when she brought the car in to the Toyota dealer for regular servicing. He might find even more damages, costing her even more. For a moment, after some more negotiation, I agreed to still another reduction -- down to $3700. Then, suddenly, I stopped packing, deciding the price was so low, I might as well take chance driving the car back and risk any repairs on the way. So no deal. And when I drove home over 500 miles, the car was fine. It didn't even need water. That's when I realized, Irma was one of those sharks, trying to bargain me down with a phony mechanic and claims of damage, at a time when I was especially tired and emotionally vulnerable. Since then, others have told me stories about how they were taken advantage of when they were tired and weren't paying attention. One woman lawyer was burglarized while she was in her own office. She was working late, tired because of a long brief she had to draft, when a man knocked on her door, claiming to be looking for someone else. "No, he's not here. Wrong office," she said, turning back to her paper. In that moment, the burglar grabbed an expensive briefcase she had perched on a shelf near the door and left. She didn't know the briefcase had been stolen until it was time to go home. By then, the burglar was long gone, and the police offered little hope of finding the burglar. "Just file an insurance report," the patrol officer said as he left. Perhaps you have your own story or know others with theirs. What all these stories suggest is when you are most vulnerable -- tired, stressed, under pressure -- that's when you have to be the most alert to the sharks and predators. Like beasts in the wild, they can sense when you're in trouble -- and they appear to take advantage of you. They respond like lions who go after the weakest wildebeest straggling behind the herd; like sharks who are drawn by the smell of blood when someone is wounded. So, at such times, be careful not to let down your guard. Though at these times you may most especially want and need help, be careful. Your "savior" could be a shark in disguise -- a shark that can slip in quickly, bite, and swim away. So pay attention and watch for signs that the person proferring help or asking seemingly "innocent" questions may be covering up a darker design. * * * * * * Gini Graham Scott, Ph.D., J.D., is
the author of over 35 books, a speaker and seminar leader, and the director
of Changemakers and Creative Communications and Research. She specializes
in the area of social issues, criminal justice, and lifestyles. Her latest
books are Work with Me: Resolving Everyday Conflict in
Your Organization and The Innovative Edge.
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